Make You Feel My Love
by yulebrinner25
Summary: Brokenhearted and alone, Emily Fields makes a life-changing decision that will allow her to feel the love she's lost. But when the one she's been waiting for comes into her life, will Emily have the courage to risk everything and open her heart or will she choose to keep it locked away, safe from ever being broken again?
1. Chapter 1

**A/N: Hi Everyone! I'm back! I'm so sorry for my long absence. I have been writing, I promise, but the main reason I've been slacking is because of all the amazing Paily stories you guys are writing. Who wants to write when there are so many incredible stories to read?! I blame you guys for my procrastination. ;) **

**I'm sorry this isn't an update on IAWLT. I have been working on it but I'm kind of stuck on it at the moment. I've been working on a few other stories to keep my creative juices flowing. This is one of them. I hope you like it. The idea just came to me and I went with it. I've got two others in the works that I will try to get up and running but this is the one I've written the most on and I wanted to get it posted and see what you guys think. Though not a very long chapter, it's very wordy. I apologize for that. I'm very new to writing (as I've mentioned about 1000 times) and I suck at summarizing, especially with dialogue. I will work on that. Please don't hesitate to tell me what you think (good or bad) or offer advise or suggestions. Thank you for just taking the time to read this. And thank you to all the encouraging reviews and PMs I've received while I was away. Your kind words were what kept me going. It feels good to be back. :)**

* * *

"That one. He's perfect." Emily said, excitedly. She knew she had picked a winner. Ivy League educated, likes to travel, good medical history, average height, nice eyes, adorable baby picture. Yep, this was the one.

She had been planning this for months and she couldn't believe it was finally happening. Her family and friends weren't totally on board with Emily's decision, stating that she was still very young and had no reason to rush this, but Emily was tired or waiting around for the right person to come along. She thought she had the right person but she just ended up getting the rug pulled out from under her, which left her broken and crumpled on the floor. The only thing that helped get her back on her feet was the image of holding her child in her arms.

At twenty-eight, she knew she was still young and still had plenty of child bearing years left but she just knew this was the right decision. Emily had always wanted to be a mother and she couldn't wait to hold her precious little bundle of joy that donor 14102 would provide her. Ovulation day couldn't come soon enough.

* * *

Emily woke suddenly to the feeling of the most intense nausea she'd ever experienced. She raced to the bathroom with her hand over her mouth, praying she'd make it there in time. When the entire contents of her stomach seemed to be emptied, Emily had a split second thought of "Why me?" until she realized what this could mean. She threw open her medicine cabinet, knocking over everything to get to the box of pregnancy tests she'd purchased two weeks ago, on the day of her insemination.

Emily couldn't believe how long three minutes could feel like. She was going out of her mind, finding nothing to keep her distracted. They say that a watched pot never boils. Well, a watched pregnancy test is far more excruciating.

At last, the timer beeped and suddenly, she was frozen. Three minutes of torture and now she was afraid to look. She had gotten her hopes up and knew she'd be crushed if the results weren't what she wanted.

She took a deep breath and picked up the test, counting backwards from three in her head. Tears filled her eyes and streamed down her face as she stared at the pink plus sign. She couldn't believe it. Her dream of being a mother was finally coming true.

* * *

"Emily Fields?" Asked the nurse as she entered the office waiting room.

Emily smiled and waved at the woman before gathering her things and following her through the door. After being weighed, the nurse took Emily to an examination room to take some blood and check her temperature and blood pressure.

"Alright, everything looks good." The nurse said, pulling a gown out of a drawer. "You'll need to undress completely and put this gown on so that it opens in the front. Then you can take a seat in the exam chair and this sheet will go over your lap, okay?"

Emily nodded and smiled.

"Alright, I'll leave you to it. The doctor should be in to see you shortly."

"Great, thank you." Emily replied.

Undressed and gowned, Emily sat down in the exam chair, laying the sheet over her lap. A sense of nervous excitement washing over her.

A few minutes later, there was a soft knock on the door before it opened and a beautiful woman walked in.

"Emily Fields?" The woman asked.

Emily could only nod, stunned by the woman's beauty.

"Hi, I'm Doctor McCullers. It's nice to meet you, Emily." The doctor smiled and held out her hand to shake Emily's.

"N-nice to meet you too." She stammered. Emily gazed into the woman's beautiful eyes, realizing she hadn't let go of the doctor's hand.

"Sorry" Emily explained. "I just didn't expect you to be so..." _Gorgeous!_ She stopped herself from saying. "...young." She finished.

"I get that a lot." The woman laughed, a slight blush tinting her cheeks. "I finished high school early and just dove right into college and med school. It's allowed me to start my career earlier than most would expect to but it didn't leave much room for a social life." The doctor couldn't believe how stunning Emily was. She needed to pull herself together if she was going to be able to make it through this examination.

"Does your work still keep you pretty busy? I mean, now that you're done with school, have you found time for a social life?" _Why, Emily? Why are you doing this to yourself? Shut it down!_ She regretted asking as soon as the words left her mouth. She knew she was entering dangerous territory by asking such a leading question. She just couldn't understand how this woman was single. But, she reminded herself that she couldn't let herself care.

_Is she flirting with me?_ The doctor hoped.

"Things have calmed down much more since finishing my residency, so I've been able to get out a bit but I've been so focused on school and starting my career that I sometimes feel very out of touch with the outside world."

"Yeah, I understand that. It's a jungle out there." She replied, a lump forming in her throat as she realized how true her own statement was. _Kill or be killed_, she thought to herself.

The young doctor noticed the faraway look in Emily's eyes and asked her next question tentatively. "So, if you don't mind me asking, is the father in the picture?"

"Oh, no. There's no father. I mean, there is, obviously, but...I used a cryobank donor. I'm..." Emily stopped herself from revealing her sexuality. For some reason, she felt the need to keep that to herself. "...doing this on my own." She finally answered.

"Wow. That's amazing." The doctor said, genuinely. "I commend you on your bravery."

"Oh, thanks. I've just always wanted to be a mother and it just...felt like the right time." She replied.

* * *

After the breast exam and Pap smear-during which the young doctor mentally berated herself for having impure thoughts about her patient-it was time for the ultrasound.

"There's your bladder right there. This is your uterus. And...there's your little peanut."

"Oh wow." Emily whispered in amazement as she stared adoringly at the tiny little dot on the screen.

"And...there it is. There's the heartbeat." The doctor smiled at Emily as the tears flowed down her face.

"That's amazing." Emily laughed, wiping her tear stained cheeks. It was the most beautiful sound she'd ever heard. _My baby. _This was the happiest she'd felt in a long time.

"I'm just going to take a few good pictures for you to take home with you and then we'll be all done."

"It looks like you are 7 weeks and 5 days pregnant, so that will put your due date at the end of November on the 28th. A Thanksgiving baby." The young doctor excitedly exclaimed.

"Definitely something to be thankful for." Emily replied, still wiping her eyes from the new tears that had fallen.

"Thanks." Emily said, taking the tissue the young doctor offered her. "I can't believe this is really happening." Emily said, happily.

"It's pretty amazing, isn't it?" The doctor agreed.

"It really is. It's gonna be so hard to wait but I've got a lot of stuff to do to prepare so I guess it's good that I've still got lots of time. First things first is getting a bigger apartment. I don't think my studio is gonna cut it." Emily joked.

A sudden idea came to the doctor's mind, though she was a little hesitant to bring it up, not wanting to come across as a total creep. "I hope this isn't too inappropriate but the couple that lives in the apartment next to mine are moving out at the end of the week. It's not on the market yet so if you're interested, I could put in a good word for you with my landlord and setup a time for you to come look at it. I've been in it a few times. It's a beautiful two bedroom with a killer view of Lake Washington. It's a really great building in a great area, just outside the city." The doctor realized how much she was rambling. She hoped she hadn't totally freaked Emily out as her suggestion, already pretty weird, may have sounded like she was begging the girl to move in.

"Wow, really? You'd do that for me? I mean, you just met me. How do you know I'm not like a serial killer or something?" Emily joked, she was expecting the doctor to laugh.

"Your eyes." The doctor said, simply. "They're very kind." The doctor smiled, gazing into those beautiful pools of amber as though she were seeing right into Emily's soul.

Emily swallowed nervously, entranced by the chocolate eyes staring back at her.

"Sorry, I just meant...you seem like a really nice person." The doctor explained, completely embarrassed by her inability to act normal around this woman.

"Thanks. That's nice of you to say." Emily willed herself to suppress the butterflies she felt fluttering around in her stomach.

The sound of the printer broke the tension. The doctor, grateful for the interruption.

"Here you go." She said as she handed Emily her sonogram photos.

"Thank you." Emily smiled, giving the photos a long, adoring look.

The doctor gazed at Emily, who was still staring at the photos. She felt an incredible warmth inside of her, truly happy for this woman whom she's known all of one hour.

She loved her job. She got to see miracles happen every day. But for some reason, this felt different.

"Alright, well I'll let you go ahead and get dressed. When you're finished, you can go up to the reception desk and she can help you schedule your next appointment in about four weeks, okay?"

Emily nodded.

"It was really nice to meet you, Emily." The doctor said.

"Yeah, it was nice to meet you too."

The doctor turned to walk out the door but before she did, Emily spoke up.

"Um, Doctor McCullers?" The doctor turned to face her. "About that apartment in your building...is there a number I can get to reach you about setting up that viewing?"

The doctor was completely surprised. She'd thought for sure she'd completely creeped Emily out, assuming the woman was just being polite earlier when she thanked her for the recommendation.

"Oh...y-yes, of course!" The doctor patted all her pockets, trying to remember where she keeps her notepad. She was looking like a complete idiot. She finally found it in the left pocket of her lab coat. She pulled out her pen and wrote the needed information down.

"Here you go." She said, handing Emily the slip of paper. "That's my cell and the address for the building."

"Great, thanks. I'll call you later this week to setup that viewing. Thanks again for thinking of me. It's one less thing to worry about." Emily said, appreciatively.

"Of course. I look forward to your call." That was an understatement if she'd ever heard one, the doctor thought.

"Congratulations on your pregnancy, Emily. You're gonna be a great mom." She smiled.

"Thank you." Emily replied, truly touched at the doctor's words.

The doctor nodded, then left the room.


	2. Chapter 2

**A/N: Thank you to everyone who took the time to read my new story. Thank you, also, to all those who reviewed. Your kind words were very encouraging and meant a lot to me. I'm sorry I didn't get this up sooner but two weeks is pretty fast for me. ;) I will try to update as often as I can but I think two weeks is a good and realistic goal for me. I'm sorry, I wish I could be one of those people who can post a new chapter everyday. Those people blow me away. Hopefully, the more I write, the faster I will be able to update. Thank you again for your support. Please continue to express your likes and dislikes and make any suggestions on what you would like to see. Hope you all have a very Happy Easter or whatever holiday you celebrate this time of year. :)**

* * *

Later that week, Emily called the young doctor to setup a time to view the now vacant apartment for Sunday afternoon. Earlier in the week, she'd done some research on the building online and was impressed by the beautiful photos and amenities the building had to offer. It was close enough to the city that she wouldn't have trouble commuting, yet far enough that she'd be away from all the hustle and bustle. _Plus, it wouldn't hurt to have a doctor living right next door_, she thought to herself. She stopped herself from adding a comment on the doctor's attractiveness to her thought.

She parked in the guest parking section in the parking garage and took the elevator up to the lobby, quickly shooting the doctor a text message letting her know she was here. When she got off the elevator, she looked around the beautiful and spacious lobby, finally spotting the doctor in a chair in the sitting area in the left corner of the room by a beautifully modern fireplace. The doctor met Emily's eyes and gave her a dazzling smile as if Emily was her favorite person in the world.

_God, why does she have to look like that? _Emily took a few deeps breaths to slow her racing heart.

"You made it!" The doctor said, excitedly. "Did you find it okay?" She asked.

"Yeah, I found it just fine, thank you. Your directions were easy to follow." She smiled. "This place is beautiful." Emily said, looking around the large room.

"I know, right?! I love it here." The doctor agreed, smiling. "Well, should we go take a look at around? I got the keys to the apartment from Carl, the building manager. He said I could show you around and if you are interested in the place, we can go see him in his office. He figured it would put less pressure on you to love it if he weren't standing right next to you." The doctor explained, chuckling.

"Oh, that's nice of him. Though, if the apartment is anything like this lobby, I don't think that would've been a problem." She smiled.

"Well, then I'm sure you won't be disappointed." The doctor replied, trying not to get her hopes up about this goddess of a woman living right next door to her.

"Right here is the fitness center. All the equipment is top of the line and there's always at least one of everything available, even during peak hours." The doctor explained as she walked Emily around the impressive gym.

"Another great option they offer here is working with a personal trainer. We have a contract with the gym down the street and we have a few of their trainers on retainer for anyone that wants to work with one."

"Down this hall is where I spend most of my time when I'm not working." The doctor smirked.

Emily could smell the unmistakable scent of chlorine getting stronger and stronger the further down the hall they went.

The pool was an impressive size for an apartment complex. "You swim?" Emily asked, intrigued that she could have something in common with the young doctor.

"Not as intensely as I used to but I still like to get a few laps in when I can. I swam in high school and college but I had to give it up when I started med school. I would still swim for fun whenever I got the chance though. Being in the water just helps to clear my head." The doctor contemplated.

"I know exactly what you mean. I also swam in high school and college. I always feel so at home in the water. It's always been a way for me to escape when I just needed a break from everything." Emily explained.

The doctor was mesmerized as she gazed into Emily's eyes, the cool blue water of the pool reflected in those warm amber orbs, while listening to Emily express her passion for swimming, understanding that part of her that no one else ever had before.

The doctor wasn't sure how much time had passed before she realized Emily had finished speaking. "Well, you and I will have to race sometime. See if we've still got it." The doctor smirked.

"You're on." Emily chuckled. "Though that probably won't be happening for at least eight more months." She smiled, placing her palm against her stomach.

"Yes, of course." The doctor agreed. "How are you feeling, by the way? Are you still experiencing morning sickness?" She asked, quickly flipping into doctor mode.

"I'm feeling great, thanks. The morning sickness hasn't been too bad." Emily explained, thankfully.

"Good, I'm glad to hear that. Don't hesitate to call me if you have any questions or concerns." The doctor replied, sincerely, though she hoped she wasn't being too overbearing.

"Thank you, I really appreciate that." Emily replied.

After the doctor showed Emily the Rec room and the media room, they took the elevator up to the fifth and top floor.

"Here we are, apartment 502." The doctor unlocked the door and held it open for Emily to enter.

Emily walked in and was immediately hit with a sense of home.

"On the right here is a full guest bathroom." The doctor pointed out, taking time to let Emily look around before showing her more.

"Here's the laundry room slash mud room." The doctor indicated to the room off the left of the entryway. She noticed the excitement in Emily's eyes and voice at this particular room.

"Oh wow, it has a sink and built ins and tons of counter space. This is perfect." Emily said, excitedly.

"This is the master." Emily walked in to the beautiful room and was immediately drawn to the sliding glass doors, to the right of the King sized bed, which led to a balcony. She opened the doors and stepped out on to the balcony, gazing upon the beautiful sight before her. The doctor wasn't kidding about the view.

"This view is gorgeous." Emily said, looking out over Lake Washington, the Emerald City glistening in the distance.

"Yes, it is." The doctor replied, gazing at Emily. She'd been trying to keep it together but the sight of Emily standing next to her, her raven locks blowing in the wind as the golden rays of the sun, peeking through the clouds, danced across her bronze skin, had her heart pounding, her pulse racing, and her mind wandering to inappropriate places.

Emily heard the reverence in the doctor's voice and turned toward her. She was caught off guard to discover the doctor looking back at her.

The doctor quickly turned toward the lake. "Uh…yeah…I love the view from up here. It's what sold me on this place." She said, letting her heart rate return to normal. She motioned to her right. "I like to come out here after work, with a hot cup of tea, to unwind from the day."

"Is that your balcony?" Emily asked, after turning to her right to see what the doctor had pointed out.

"Yeah. On this floor, we're the only two apartments on this side of the building so it's nice and quiet. Plus, we have the best view." She said, looking back out over the water, though unable to stop her eyes from drifting back over to the stunning woman next to her.

The doctor proceeded to show Emily around the rest of the apartment, saving the best for last, she hoped.

"This would be the baby's room." The doctor said, gently, smiling when Emily's eyes lit up.

It was currently setup as an office but Emily could see the whole room in her mind. She knew exactly where she would place the crib, what artwork to put on the walls. She could see it all. This room had the same breathtaking view as the one from the master balcony and she could see herself gazing out upon the water as she rocked her baby to sleep.

"I'll take it." Emily said, assuredly.

"Really?!" The doctor asked, excitedly.

"Yes. This is the one. From the second I walked in here, I knew this was my home. Our home." Emily gazed lovingly at her stomach as she gently rubbed her palm over it.

The doctor smiled widely at the girl in front of her, fighting back tears as she watched the beauty of the special moment the woman was sharing with her unborn child.

Emily finally looked up at the doctor who was smiling sweetly back at her. "Thank you so much, Dr. McCullers. I never would have found this place without you. I just know we're gonna be happy here." She said, sincerely.

The doctor cleared her throat. "I'm just happy I could help. It really is a great place to live. And please, call me Paige. We're neighbors now." She smiled.

"Paige." Emily said, trying it out, oblivious to the shiver that had run down the doctor's spine at hearing the woman speak her name.

"Alright, well, let's go talk to Carl. He'll be thrilled to hear how much you love the place."

* * *

The rental agreement was signed, the I's dotted, the T's crossed. The place was Emily's and she couldn't be more excited. She was finally getting her life back together. She couldn't wait to build more of this life for her and her child.

As a celebration for Emily's new place, Paige offered to take Emily out for a late lunch at one of the doctor's favorite lunch spots, Café Noir.

It was nice out so they decided to sit outside and eat to enjoy the sun that they so rarely get to see, living in the Pacific Northwest.

Each woman discovered that the other was not a native of Washington, Paige being from Connecticut and Emily from Pennsylvania.

"So, what brought you out to Seattle?" The doctor asked Emily.

Emily seemed a bit hesitant to answer. "It's…kind of a long story but basically, I just needed a change. I've been here a few times for work and I've always loved it here—the rain, the greenery, the mountains—and a job opportunity came up here so I took it."

"I'm a photographer." Emily answered, sensing Paige's next question. "I'm assisting an old family friend at her art gallery. I'd love to open my own someday, so she's been showing me the ropes."

"That's amazing." Paige replied. "What kind of photography do you do?"

"All kinds but for the last five years I was working for Travel Magazine so my main focus was landscapes, landmarks, and documenting different cultures."

"No way! Travel Magazine?! I used to subscribe to that! The articles were interesting but I used to just love to look at the beautiful photos. I was so sad when they stopped printing them and switched to an online publication. I can't believe you worked for them! That's amazing! What made you leave?" Paige asked, excitedly.

For the second time today, Emily looked hesitant to answer Paige's question.

"I'm sorry. I shouldn't have asked. It's none of my business." Paige apologized, feeling bad for being so nosy and even more so for causing that pained look on Emily's face.

"No, no, it's fine. I decided to leave because I wanted to slow down and put down roots. I loved working at Travel because I got to fly all over the world and see so many beautiful places but all that traveling became exhausting and I longed for more stability. For a place that I could call home. And that kind of nomadic lifestyle wouldn't allow for pregnancy and having a family so I left and came here."

At hearing Emily's words, Paige felt an intense feeling of admiration for the beautiful woman sitting across from her. The look on her face gave Emily butterflies.

"What?" Emily asked, smiling.

Paige shook her head slowly. "Nothing, it's just…you're gonna be an amazing mom." She said with conviction, causing a blush to tint Emily's cheeks and the fluttering in her stomach to increase tenfold.


End file.
